All Curled Up In Bed

It's been a while since I wrote last, or at least it feels like it, although when I look at the date of my last entry that was only three-four days ago...

In writing moment I'm curled up in bed in my pajamas, and wearing my boyfriend's navy blue hoodie that I kinda sorta borrowed and never gave back to him... As a general rule, I decided only to wear it when I really miss him. And well, tonight I do. More than usual. It might have to do with that we had a long chat on Facebook today, or that he told me that his day really wasn't one of the better... Our conversations wasn't sad though. We actually laughed a lot, both of us. And we were talking about a person that I know and he's met, a person who thinks he has feelings for me but because I told him he'll never be more than a friend to me, that I made my choice, and that he has to find someone else to love, he's trying to get over me by being mad at me on Facebook - via picture and status update comments. My man offered to kick his sorry behind, but I said it's not necessary. I mean, it's not like I care about it - it's actually kind of hilarious.

If you've followed my blog from the beginning, which I doubt anyone has, but at least by looking at the history to the right you see that this is the third summer I'm writing on here. And sadly, it will also be the last. But that's not the point, I'll get to that later... Anyway, if you've read my entries from the previous Junes, Julys, and Augusts, you'll not be surprised to hear that I'm having problems sleeping. I get that every summer, and blame it on the sun that barely sets, and it doesn't get dark at all - twilight, at most. But I think it has also to do with the dreams. I dream too much in the summer. And the dreams are not always pleasant. I've dreamt that I've been shot by a person so close to me that when I woke up I was crying for hours and I was so terrified this person would find out because I was so ashamed that I didn't even write it in my diary. It was more than a year ago, or maybe it was the summer before, even, but  I remember like it was last night. And I've dreamt of people that are no longer in my life, nor do I wish to have them there. I can't for the sake of my life figure out why I have these dreams. I really don't want to sleep in fear of having another. I hate these dreams. And don't tell me to get a dream catcher, because I have six of them already - my brother made two of them when he was in primary school, I bought one in Universal Studios, CA, my American grandma got me a big one from a Native American woman in her town, I bought one in Kenya, and I made one myself today.



I guess this blog entry is just another way of stalling. I should blow out my candle and try to sleep, but I'm too cozy sitting here in my man's hoodie, listening to music by an almost-local band... Might as well go get a glass of wine, but I know that'll do me no good - I know I'd sleep, but that's no way to exit my teenage years and starting college life, turning to alcohol.

I'll try to focus on that my boyfriend said he's sent me something by snail mail - and that I just have to fly down there soon, because some of his friends don't believe that we're together, they thought our picture was photoshopped!

I'm just gonna scatter some pictures from Google and WeHeartIt.com through this entry now...









 

 And for those of you who unserstand this language and dialect... This is a really beautiful song by a band I've been listening to this whole time while writing this entry:
 

 

I haven't said that I calm the storm
Haven't said I turn tears to wine
Haven't said I can walk on water
Have said that if you want me, I'm yours


The Norwegian Teenager 

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a teenager with thoughts ©

a teenager with thoughts ©

19, Ørland

This is an anonymous blog by a Norwegian teenage girl. I may reveal myself someday, but for now my identity shall remain unknown for those of you who do not already know who I am. I'll explain all of that later. Please leave a comment so I can see you've visited, in whichever language you prefer!

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